now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.