Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize