Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
