I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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