i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize