i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
