have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
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