whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
I think my fart just growled at me.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
