no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
