btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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