I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Randomize
