who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
