I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize