her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Randomize
