U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Randomize
