Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Randomize
