youre lurking in front of me
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
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