Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
