I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
