i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
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