So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
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