found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
