Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
