its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
