i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
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Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
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Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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