If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Randomize
