i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
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