You work out of a Hotel?
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
