you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
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