I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
