He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Randomize
