Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Randomize
