wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize
