FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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