i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
