just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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