So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I'm too high and old for this...
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
