my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
