it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
