Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
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