i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
