Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
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