Porn is love you can see.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Randomize
