I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
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