it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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