i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
what is it with giant penises always finding me
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Randomize
