Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
