The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
