You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
birth control should be required to get into college
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Randomize