dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
