smell my finger.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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